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Acknowledgements and Disclaimers

The vast majority of the content on this page has been taken directly from and/or is loosely based upon similar content on the Kennedy Software site, for which I am eternally grateful, because I didn't have to write it all myself.


We prefer to include links to technical material that is covered elsewhere, rather than repeating it here. In this regard, we have generally not sought specific permission to include such public links; we hope their inclusion is acceptable to their owners, and have presented all information and links to others in support of their work and efforts. We'll gladly comply with any special requests from any authors/owners of such data or information.

If you have any problems or suggestions related to finding, visiting, viewing, or navigating this site, or if you have queries on any material here, please contact us.


Terms of Use and Acknowledgements 

We hereby acknowledge all Patents, Copyrights, Trademarks, and Registered Trademarks referenced on this site.

Unless stated otherwise in reference to specific software products at this site, the contents of this site may not be copied other than for non-commercial individual reference, with all copyright or other proprietary notices retained, and thereafter may not be recopied, reproduced or otherwise redistributed. All products supplied to clients and/or developed for clients by Diamond Software Group, Inc., remain the property of Diamond Software Group, Inc. until paid for in full, and until the terms of ownership transfer are agreed. We use reasonable efforts to include accurate and up-to-date information on this site, but we make no warranties or representations as to the accuracy, suitability or correctness of the site contents and products. All users agree that all access to and use of this site and all products available from this site, are at their own risk. Neither Diamond Software Group, Inc., nor any party involved in providing or delivering this site and all products thereon, shall be liable for any direct, incidental, consequential, indirect or punitive damages arising out of access to, use of, or inability to use this site and products, or any errors or omissions in the content thereof.

This entire web site, including all pages, is Copyright 2003-2014 by Diamond Software Group, Inc. All rights reserved.


Privacy Statement

This privacy statement discloses our attitude and technical practices for this site. We are not responsible for the Privacy practices, policies, or contents of any associated or referenced sites.

We recognize the importance of protecting the privacy of any information available about you, or supplied by you, and are committed to using our best efforts to respect your privacy.

We appreciate that some details about you are usually automatically revealed when you visit web sites, but we do NOT collect nor use any such data. We do not investigate, nor even know, what data is known about you by our ISP, nor by any entity in the chain linking your browser to our site. We do not generate "cookies" (or other similar techniques) on your system, and this site does not knowingly contain any advertisements, spyware mechanisms, etc.

We collect and retain only data voluntarily supplied directly by you, when you e-mail us, and/or submit details on an order or inquiry form on this site. Furthermore, with sensitive details such as credit card information, we only use the services of recognized providers of secured server SSL encryption of data, and established 3rd party providers such as Paypal.

We might request some general contact details about you, details to process payments, or technical details about your computer systems, but only as relevant to your order or inquiry. You may opt out of supplying any of this data. 

We will NEVER release your details to any other party, except as required by law.

If, at any time, you wish to query, revise or erase any details we retain about you, or if you have any questions on this privacy policy, please contact us, and we will make every effort to meet your requirements.

Though it operates in a different jurisdiction, and therefore under different privacy laws, we recognize and agree with the overall principles of schemes such as that provided by http://www.truste.org. It has a good charter for both web publishers and web users, and is recommended. In general, the following issues are identified:

What information is collected
Who collects it
How is it used
With whom is it or may it be shared
What choices are available to the user re collection, use and distribution of the information
What security procedures protect the loss, misuse or alteration of information
How inaccuracies can be corrected


And Finally, the Ultimate Disclaimer

DISCLAIMER: Action figures sold separately. Add toner. All models over 18 years of age. All rights reserved, all lefts reserved. Allow four to six seconds, or weeks, for delivery. An equal opportunity electron employer, or message. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental. Any resemblance to actual software, running or hung, is unintentional and purely coincidental. Apply only to affected area. Approved for veterans. As seen on TV. At participating locations only. Avoid contact with eyes and skin and avoid inhaling fumes. Avoid contact with mucous membranes. Avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place.

Batteries not included. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Beware of dog. Bits are slightly enlarged to show detail. Booths for two or more. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.

Cache and carry. Call toll free number before digging. Caveat emptor. Check here if tax deductible. Close cover before striking. Code used in this software was made from 100% recycled electrons. Colors may fade. Constantly volatile when exposed to static pointers. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Contents may settle during shipment. Contest ends 31-Dec-2010. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.

Disclaimer does not cover accident, alien attack, attempted modification, attempting to actually run the software, broken antenna or marred cabinet, broken glass, bugs in the code, cosmic rays, customer adjustments that are not covered in the joke list, damage from improper installation, damage from improper reading, dropping the item, earthquake, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, falling rocks, flood, flying squirrels, forest fire, house arrest, hurricane, improper or unauthorized reading, incidents owing to an airplane crash, incidents related to all types of accidents, incorrect line voltage, leaky roof, lightning, missing or altered serial numbers, misuse, motor vehicle accidents, mud slides, neglect, other Acts of Bob, other Acts of God, projectiles (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.), repair, ship sinking or taking on water, sonic boom vibrations, tornado, tsunami, unauthorized repair, verbal assaults, volcanic eruption.

Do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle. Do not disturb. Do not place near a flammable or magnetic source. Do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit. Do not remove this disclaimer under penalty of law. Do not stamp. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Do not write below this line. Documents are provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied. Don't quote me on anything. Don't quote me on that. Driver does not carry cash. Drop in any mailbox.

Edited for television. Employees and their families are not eligible. For external use only.

Falling rock. First pull up, then pull down. Flames redirected to /dev/null. For a limited time only. For external use only. For off-road use only. For office use only. For recreational use only. Free software offer valid only at participating FTP sites.

Hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat. Hard hat area.

If a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue use and consult your magic eight-ball. If any defects are discovered, do not attempt to read them yourself, but return to an authorized service center. If condition persists, consult your physician. If ingested, do not induce vomiting, and if symptoms persist, consult a physician. If symptoms persist, delete yourself immediately. If this software begins to smoke, then run, do not walk, towards the nearest exit. If you suspect an overloaded operator, destroy immediately. Instructions are included.

Keep away from open flames and avoid inhaling (fumes). Keep away from sunlight, pets, and small children. Keep cool; process promptly.

Limit one per family. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. List at least two alternate dates. List each check separately by bank number. List was current at time of printing. Lost ticket pays maximum rate.

Many suitcases look alike. May be too intense for some viewers. May cause drowsiness, alcohol may intensify this effect. Message is provided "as is" without any warranties. Message remains the property of the Bank and must be returned on request. Motor vehicles only. Must be 18 to enter. Must be 18 to read.

No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. No animals were harmed in the production of these documents. No animals were used to test the runtime performance of this software. No Canadian coins. No extra salt, MSG, artificial color or flavoring added. No money down. No one under 17 admitted. No other warranty expressed or implied. No Parking. No passes accepted for this engagement. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. No preservatives added. No purchase necessary. No shirt, no shoes, no software, no message, no service, no kidding. No solicitors. No Spitting. No Standing. No substitutions allowed. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. No user-serviceable parts inside. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Not liable for damages due to use or misuse or inability to understand. Not recommended for children. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. Not the Beatles.

Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Offer good for a limited time only. Offer valid only at participating sites. One size fits all. Other copyright laws for specific entries apply wherever noted. Other restrictions may apply.

Package sold by weight, not volume. Parental advisory - explicit lyrics. Parental Care Advisory - explicit source code. Penalty for private use. Place stamp here. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Possible penalties for early withdrawal. Post no Bills. Post office will not deliver without postage. Postage will be paid by addressee. Prerecorded for this time zone. Preservatives added to improve freshness. Price does not include taxes. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Prosecutors will be violated.

Quality may vary. Quantities are limited while supplies last.

Read at your own risk. Read with food. Reader assumes full responsibility. Reading is addictive. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Refrigerate after opening. Reheat if eaten before date on carton. Replace with same type. Reproduction strictly prohibited. Restaurant package, not for resale. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Ribbed for your pleasure.

Safety goggles may be required during use. Safety goggles must be worn at all times. Sanitized for your protection. Sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is broken. See label for sequence. Shading within a garment may occur. Sign here without admitting guilt. Simulated picture. Since software is hand-crafted, there will be slight differences in each object. Slightly enlarged to show detail. Slightly higher outside of the continental US - and Ireland. Slightly higher west of the Rockies. Slippery when wet. Smoking this message, or this software, could be hazardous to your health. Software is provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied. Some assembly and C++ required. Some equipment shown is optional. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Store in a cool dry place. Subject to change without notice. Subject to FCC approval. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.

Take a number please. Text may contain explicit materials some readers may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised. Text used in these documents is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles. The best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh. The white zone is for passenger loading and unloading only. These documents do not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company, my friends, or my rabbit. This message, or offer, is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted. This product is meant for educational purposes only. This program and documentation reflects the thoughts, opinions, ideas, and body odor of myself; it does not reflect the thoughts, opinions, ideas, and/or body odor of my company, my friends, my wife, my husband, my sons, my daughters, my fishes, my roses, my dogs, my hamsters, or my trash. This software is a void pointer to null where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted. This software is subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Type hard, you are making five copies.

Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Use caution when operating a car or dangerous machinery. Use of this message is governed by the terms and conditions of the Bank and Message Holder Agreement received by the Message Holder. Use only as directed. Use only with proper ventilation. Use other side for additional listings. User assumes full liabilities.

Void where prohibited.

We have sent the forms which seem right for you.

You are not in Kansas any more. You do not need to be present to win. You may distribute this message freely but you may not make a profit from it. You must be present to win. Your canceled check is your receipt. Your mileage may vary.

The revolution will not be televised.

This supersedes all previous disclaimers.


Author Unknown


Copyright 2003-2014 Diamond Software Group, Inc.
Terms of Use, Privacy Statement, and Disclaimers